Healing Neen

Last week at work, one of my co-workers brought in a video about trauma-centered care.  The name of the video is Healing Neen,and I must say it was intense, depressing, uplifting, and oh-my-gosh-I'm-a-terrible-human-beingy all at once.

The video- I'm not sure if I should call it a documentary or a movie...I think it's a documentary- centers around Tonier Cain.  I won't give too much of it away, because I think everyone should see it (especially those in the human service field), but suffice it to say that this woman went through some amazingly horrible crap as a child- the kind of stuff that you think only happens on Lifetime movies.

Like many wayward souls, Tonier  channeled all of the wrong done to her and turn it into a romp through the system.  Drug use.  Prostitution.  Homelessness.  83 arrests.  66 convictions.  If it wasn't so illegal, it'd be impressive.  Those are video game numbers.  That is, if they made a video game about breaking the law.  But surely they would never do such a thing...

As I watched the movie, I kept thinking about how flawed many of the systems in our society are.  Even with those I've been a part of that try to help people, there is a focus on fixing superficial symptoms, with the idea that the fixes will sink in and help the person to have a better chance to 'get along' in life.  Kind of like how we wrap up dog crap in boxes and give it to other people as Christmas presents.  Um, Mom, I hope you're not reading this.  I don't want to spoil the surprise. 

Before I get too far, I'm not suggesting that trauma is a sort of "Get out of jail free" card, or that it enables people to do what they want.  I'm all about accountability, and I think that rules and laws are there for a reason (although, I suppose if I wanted to venture out deep into conspiracy theory territory, I could talk about how rules and laws keep us from...nah, I won't go there).  Besides, I can't say for sure that every person who commits a crime has undergone some sort of trauma (although it wouldn't surprise me to find out that the number was very, very high.

Tonier has worked her way out of a life of incarceration to become a very successful career woman, traveling around as a public speaker about trauma-focused care.  At one point during the movie, she talked about the idea of someone looking at her as an inmate and being able to see her as she is now.  It is quite a powerful sentiment- being able to look at someone and see them for the potential they hold, not for their accomplishments to date.

Unfortunately, the way things are set up now, those types of moments rarely get realized.  One of the reasons that Tonier's story stands out is because it's so rare.  I don't mean to take anything away from her- to go from what she went through (and I really stress here- YOU SHOULD SEE THIS MOVIE...I MEAN DOCUMENTARY) to being where she is today is no small feat, and I do not doubt that she has earned her "stripes" so to speak.  I just think that she stands out largely because she was able to rise above circumstances that tend to keep most people locked into their situations.

As a society, the rules and laws often serve to promote a virtual caste system.  It's easier to ignore the pain and hurt that people are dealing with when they are dealing with that hurt and pain in social unacceptable measures.  It gives us convenient labels to place on people that help ease our consciences so that we don't have to feel too guilty for turning our backs on the helpless of society.  Make their issues into moral failings- and then we can justify our self-righteousness as we cry out for the blood of the sinners.

I do believe in the idea that each person has inherent worth because they are people.  Sometimes I struggle to live out that belief- it's just easier to believe that everyone's failings are a product of their own flawed humanity and are not the desperate cries for help from someone who  has no one.  But until I (and those like me) can consistently look at my fellow man for their inherent worthfulness and not as obstacles to be stepped over, then stories like Tonier's will continue to be the exception and not the rule.

PICS-Grand Theft Auto- http://static.wikigta.org/en/images/thumb/7/79/Grand-Theft-Auto-Series.jpg/400px-Grand-Theft-Auto-Series.jpg
Saints Row 2- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saints_Row_2
Bulletproof- http://images.mmosite.com/answer/dict/upload/2009/08/03/6d6b5526d065f1ad961a1c740a2896b7.jpg
True Crime- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/True_Crime:_New_York_City
Mercenaries 2- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mercenaries_2:_World_in_Flames