Now that you've read it, I can tell you that it's not my best work (it's about ten years old after all). Hey I couldn't have told you that before you read it- then you might not have read it. Sometimes a little trickery is involved in this business. I don't make the rules- I just play by them.
Understand that I still think it's pretty good. I proudly claim it as my own. It's just....rough around the edges. In fact, when I first went through to type it out, I got about two paragraphs in when I realized that some serious rewriting could be done. I danced around points, was overly wordy, and on more than one occasion did not successfully link points together. STOP NODDING YOUR HEADS, ALL OF YOU!!!!
I ended up deciding against it- on the condition that I could critique it. Not really critique it (that's an actual skill that I actually don't possess)- I guess I was thinking I'd provide, like, the directors commentary as a bonus feature. Like any good directors commentary, I will seek to be equal parts informative, funny, and not-boring.
Let's just start with a technical issue- my love of the comma has not cooled at all. It's as if I'm working on a comma commission, or a comma-ission. Come to think of it, that's not a bad idea. I could be rich!
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| And have a beard. And also, I'm punching a giant squid on my shoulder. |
Second, I was so focused on discerning the mystery meaning of Tolkien's words that the idea that an audience will attach their own meanings onto the subject completely passed me by. Yes, Tolkien's beliefs would at the very least shade his writings in some way- but a reader would do the same thing with their own beliefs, meaning that my role was not so much herald of Tolkien's secret message- but more of hit-you-over-the-head harbinger of my own message.
In fact, that's probably my biggest frustration with this piece- I wrote it through the eyes of my younger, fundamentally religious self that looked to slap the Jesus label on anything and everything. There was no part of me that would have ever thought "Hey, maybe Tolkien just wrote this book because he had some really cool dreams"- everything was black and white to me, and I had to try and fit my own ideas and beliefs with the fact that Lord of the Rings existed.
That doesn't nullify my paper necessarily. Obviously I was writing out of the meaning that I attached to it. It's not wrong to have opinions, and my interpretation was pretty 'pro' actually (for the non-inundated, 'pro' is pretty much the best thing you can be called). Isn't that why we read movie reviews and book reviews and watch shows like 'The View' and 'Pardon the Interruption' (and no, I don't watch 'The View' anymore)? We enjoy to hear what other people thing about things. That way we can either strengthen our own beliefs and views or else feel righteous indignation that someone doesn't agree with us.
It's just that when I read this piece, it's like 23 year old Jason is in the room, talking to me, and I want to acknowledge him for everything that he meant to 32 year old Jason- while also telling him to chill out and just enjoy life. There doesn't have to be a spiritual meaning in everything. It's okay to just watch a good movie or read a good book. You don't have to write Bible verses on the cash drop envelopes at the Gas Station. If you see a license plate from Texas, don't read too much into it. Some things in life...just...are.
Back to technical disproficiency. As I am wont to do, I strayed a little off topic and spent a few too many words that were ultimately inconsequential to the main point, which was that Frodo was a parallel to Christ. I still like that premise- I think Frodo's quest parallels the Jesus QUEST of biblical lore. I just could have shaved a couple paragraphs by skipping over the Messianic qualifications of Aragorn and Gandalf (and saved that for my own little trilogy of essays) and just gone straight to Frodo...which was the point of the essay.
Of course, it doesn't matter what the point of the essay was if there was nobody to deliver it to, and that's probably the biggest glaring weakness- no real focused audience. Sometimes I feel like I'm writing to Christians, other times to non-Christians. Sometimes I'm explaining basic Lord of the Rings concepts like I'm writing a 'One Ring for Dummies' book, explaining the Ringwraiths and Rivendell. Then I basically turn around and quote the Silmarillion, quote Erestor, name-drop the Ainur and I even freaking called Mount Doom Orodruin.
At that point, I really don't think I understood the importance of knowing your audience. One could make the argument that I still don't, to which I say 'hold still while I go get a heavy iron pan'. My favorite authors to read are the ones who know their audience and cater to that audience. Bill Simmons. The guys at Cracked.com. Granted, they chose largely to write to simpletons like me- but still. I love it. It might just be that I feel like I'm a part of a bigger community when I read their stuff, so I view it more favorably- or it could be that they know who they are and who they're writing for, and that leads to more focus.
I'm also struck by a lack of research. Back then, I really didn't have any clue how big the world is, and how much information is out there. Of course, a lot of it is just airheads like me flying off the cuff. But at least I have the pretense of subjecting myself to a higher standard. Not back then though.
For instance,my comparison between Sauron and Satan was not necessarily based in empirical fact or comparison to other literary villains- or even an actual literary assessment of Satan himself- but my own understanding of what I had been told about Satan. The problem with that is that it can easily sound like I know what I'm talking about without actually knowing what I'm talking about. That's how misinformation can spread.
I'm better now about fact checking than I used to be, but sometimes things get past the goalie. A few weeks ago I forwarded around what I was told was the last-ever strip of Calvin and Hobbes comic strip. It's been out of circulation for about 15 years, so I knew it had ended, but I didn't explicitly remember the strip. The one forwarded to me was this terribly sad strip where Calvin has been put on some medication and is furiously working on some report. Hobbes wants to play, but Calvin wants to get the report done. The last shot is Calvin working while the stuffed Tiger Hobbes just sits there. It almost brought tears to my eyes- how sad, that Calvin's imagination and wonder were taken away by the system trying to control him!
Of course, then when I actually Googled the last strip, it was something much more hopeful and the above-mentioned strip was some sort of sick, bizarre fan submission or something (of course, maybe it's not. CURSE YOU INTERNET!!!). The point is that I'm trying to work towards a point where the things I write and say are either blatantly personal opinion or well researched stated facts. Least Likely To Succeed was blatantly personal opinion mixed with a lot of heresay facts. That might cut it some places- but that's not where I want to be, either as a writer or as a person.
The thing I missed the most though was my trademark humor (although some people might not miss it or worse yet- not think I'm funny at all. EEK). I do think this was probably intentional, partially because of the tone of the piece (serious) and largely due to the fact that I really hadn't discovered my own voice yet as a writer (other than the overuse of commas and utilizing superfluous words like they were going out of style).
Despite my missteps and whatnot, I do feel like it was a fairly well constructed essay, and I was setting up for the dramatic ending haymaker and.....well, I just sort of fizzled. "With the victory He purchased, we don't have to". Really? That's the dramatic ending? Geeze- the haymaker ended up more like a grazing slap across the shoulder.
All in all, I'm glad I went back into the vault and read this piece. It's always good to look back and see areas of growth as well as areas that still need tweeking. As cringing as it was at times, it was still a tremendous experience to have something I crafted see publication- no matter how small of an audience got to see it. I had a lot of fun working on the piece, and I am proud to have contributed to keeping the Lord of the Rings alive- a timeless tale of fantasy, good-versus evil, friendship...and whatever else you decide it is.
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