So I watched the Oscars last night. Not the whole thing, mind you- I was in bed by 10. And it wasn't because the Oscars sucked last night that I was in bed by 10 (although...they did suck)- it was that I was just plumb tuckered out. I decided to conduct a mad science experiment with my sleep schedule over the weekend and concluded that most nights, I should probably get more than 5 hours of sleep per night.
And I realized something- I desperately need football to not go away next season. Sure, the Oscars take place after football season, so it's not an interference there. But it was like when Frodo looked into the mystical punch bowl and saw the Shire set ablaze- I saw myself sitting home on a Sunday afternoon, watching some show about housewives...or was it house hunting...maybe Dogg the bounty hunter. I don't know. All I know is that I saw life without football- and I didn't like it.
Anyways, back to the Oscars. I don't really have too much to say about them- after all, I didn't watch the whole thing, and I honestly don't think I had seen any of the movies that were nominated for awards- except for the back half of Alice in Wonderland on Netflix Instant. I had forgot that movie came out in 2010- largely in part because it was on Netflix Instant. Isn't that like, the kiss of death for a movie? I mean, if it's legitimately good...you have to go through the whole rigmarole of sending in your last disc so that they can send you the DVD a couple days later. But if it's kinda lame (or for kids)- you get to stream it right to your PS3.
Speaking of Netflix- I think that wonderful piece of movie viewing technology is at least largely responsible for my lack of awareness about what was going on in the world of movie-dom during 2010. Seriously- I think the last movie we saw was (oooh- Palindrome) the Voyage of the Dawn Treader- and there weren't many movies before that. Because we pretty much stopped watching regular TV and started watching things on Netflix- we missed out on all sorts of movie trailers. I think I probably saw more movie trailers during the Super Bowl than I did in all of 2010.
While I lacked a clear baseline for assessing the choices of the Academy, I was able to gain an appreciation for who the Oscars are really for- those people whose names get lost in the shuffle of the end credits- the behind the scene folks who don't get to be on the cover of People or Weekly Us- but who can many times make or break a movie without us even knowing it. Those are the people that the Oscars are all about. The tabloids make it about ridiculous dresses and celebrity couples- but those people already have their fame. The Oscars exist so the no-namers get to have their day in the sun- even if they get to go right back to anonymity right after the after parties. Congratulations, guys- your hard work helps to keep movies from being school plays with famous people in them.
Here are some random thoughts on the presentation of the 83rd Oscars:
- Maybe I was just spoiled by guys like Billy Crystal and Jon Stewart and their writers, but come on- last nights show was LAME. The jokes were lame, the opening film montage was lame, the presenters that tried to be funny were lame. It was simply a train wreck. It was a combination of really poor writing and two hosts that really don't have enough ad-lib ability to fill in the blanks. I like James Franco as an actor- I like him a lot, actually. But he's no Hollywood funny man, and he's definitely not a very attractive woman. When James and Anne had to call out their mothers to get applause- I knew we were in for a very, VERY long night.
- Who knew that the dude from Chuck could sing so well? Seriously- I've only seen Zachary Levi in the Alvin and the Chipmunks 2 and some clips of his TV show. I would have never guess he had a set of silky-smooth pipes like that. Kudos, Zachary.
- I'm not sure what was a more awkward moment- Melissa Leo's rehearsed speechlessness or Christian Bale forgetting his wife's name. I'm not saying that Leo wasn't initially speechless- just that she obviously thought she wasn't going to win, and so prepared herself for the moment by concocting a speechless 'speech'. It was really painful on the eyes. And Christian- I don't care that you won an Oscar for Best Supporting Actor. You are on couch duty until further notice.
- Literally had to Wikipedia the name 'Trent Reznor' to make sure that the guy that accepted the Best Original Score Oscar was the same guy that wanted to 'F*** me like an animal' in the 90's. Yup. It was.
Overall, I'm not mad at myself that I watched the Oscars. I just wish we would have spent that time watching Inception.
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