Rex Ryan and the $75,000 F-bomb

In the spirit of Thanksgiving in three days, I have finally found something to be thankful for.  And it came to me in the most unlikely of places (New York) in the most unlikely of packages (Rex Ryan).  Guys, I am thankful for Rex Ryan. I'll say it right now, I don't even care who knows it- Jesus, thank you for giving Rex Ryan to the NFL.

True, I think he talks way too much trash for someone who hasn't really done anything except almost make it to two Super Bowls.   And...actually, I guess now that I think about it, the only thing I really hold against him is his bravado.  Hmmm...he might actually be a decent guy!

Let's see...his players seem to love playing for him.  He has a better sense of humor than most coaches.  Rexy has, for the most part, been a successful head coach- two trips to the AFC title game the last two years (his first two on the job, OH BY THE WAY).  He's quite portly, which gives me and my expanding waistline hope for success.  Shoot, I might have just talked myself into the Rex Ryan fan club.  Thank you, Thanksgiving!

Since I'm Rex's newest BFF, I have no other alternative than to come to the defense of my closest friend.  Today, the NFL announced that Rex Ryan would be fined $75,000 for swearing at a fan.  Here's the video if you haven't seen it:

Apparently the NFL stands for 'No F-bombs aLlowed', or something.  Apparently in the magical land of the NFL, a fan can provoke a coach who is coming off of a three hour emotional rollercoaster (that pretty much ended with a straight shot down into hell) into saying the 'F' word and it costs the coach $75,000.  Meanwhile, Lee Corso drops an 'Effer in a nice comfy chair surrounded by cute,cheering co-eds-

 

And don't forget beautiful college girls

and gets zero disciplinary action (other than having to apologize on-air).  So unfair.

Seriously, this is completely ridiculous!  Is anyone else as pissed off as I am pretending to be?  I know, I know- these aren't even the same situation.  Two very different bureaucracies (NFL vs. ESPN) involving two wildy divergent histories (the Sunshine Scooter versus the NFL's Marshall Mathers).  Some dufus with a webcam pokes Rex with a verbal stick (which seems about as smart as poking a bear with a stick-stick, and not just because of physical similarities) while Corso works the room like a comedian getting ready to drop the big punchline.  Just makes me sick.

I'm not really bothered by either incident, actually.  I've already talked about how words are really just formations of letters that are devoid of meaning unless it's assigned meaning from an external source.  An 'eff bomb' here or there doesn't really bother me at all- in fact, Lee Corso doubled my joy intake for his gaffer.  I just find it terrible that Ryan's more defensible act cost him 75,000 bones while Corso's seemingly more pre-meditated (at best, less of an emotional reaction) cost him a five-second apology.

Okay, okay, my ill-conceived and baseless rant in defense of my buddy is over.  Yes I was wrong.  I recognize that there are rules for a reason and that Ryan clearly violated the sportsmanship clause of the disciplinary policy.  As the coach of an NFL team, you can't take your frustrations out on the poor, defenseless probably drunk fans.  You have to keep your cool, Rex.

But this is where I show Rex that I'm a real friend.  Because not only did I stick up for him- but I'm going to help him do better next time.  I did some exhaustive research (by that I mean I read like, four articles maybe) and found some ways that Rex can blow off some steam, maintain a sense of self-deviance, and save a bundle of money (or at least get more bang for his buck). 
- Try to rip off an opponents head by grabbing the face mask and just ripping that puppy off.  That only cost Matthew Stafford $7,500.  Savings- $67,500
- Allow someone to try and tear your head off and then get pissed and retaliate, just like D.J. Moore did.  Sure, you'll get fined twice as much as the guy who tries the initial head/neck breach ($15,000), but you'll still save a cool $60,000.
- Next time there's a lockout, just say 'Whatever' to the rules and keep in touch with your players.  The Bucs just got fined 100,000 big ones for improper lockout contact.  Sure, it's more money up front.  But wouldn't you rather spend $100,000 to practice illegally than $75,000 getting pissed because it looks like you don't practice at all?
- Lots of times, we can tell if we're starting to get stressed way before we have a big blow up.  And when that happens, we just have to find someone that we're comfortable talking to.  Blow off a little steam, get some feedback, and we're good to go.  Crisis averted.  Borrow a page from Troy Polamalu's book and just keep a cell phone handy on the sidelines for such an occasion.  That'll only cost you 10k, and save you a fortune (depending on your cell phone plan, of course).
- Sometimes a little talky-talky doesn't really do the soul any good though.  In those instances, the best thing you can do is find someone in a vulnerable, defenseless position and just unload on them.  Knock that poor bastard into next week.  It won't save you a ton of change (Ryan Clark was fined $40,000 for hitting a defenseless receiver), but the satisfaction it brings will make up for it in spades.
- Don't be afraid to do something a little bit dangerous...as far as fashion goes.  The NFL had to fine Earl Bennett twice (for a total of 15,000) and threatened him with an additional $15,000 fine for wearing bright orange shoes during two games (instead of the acceptable orange and blue shoes).  Why the fine?  I posit that it's because Earl was just working those shoes, man!

Admit it- you would pretend to care about fashion to be this close to Heidi Klum.

- It's okay to admit that you don't like Tom Brady.  You hate him.  You don't have to pretend with me, Rexy- I know how you feel about him.  Especially when you look at your own QB (Mark Sanchez) and see how much he sucks when compared to Brady.  It's like that cocky neighbor kid you just can't stand...except you keep comparing him to your own kid and realizing how much better he is than your kid and so you still hate the neighbor kid but now you don't really like your own kid and ALRIGHT ALREADY JUST HIT HIM IN THE KNEE- JUST TAKE A SLEDGEHAMMER TO THAT #*%$*#@*% KNEE FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!!!!!!  Cost of relief- $15,000 (as long as it's you nicknaming one of your players 'Sledgehammer'.  An actual sledgehammer to the knee will probably run you much more than $15,000)
- Sometimes it's not what you say, but how you say it.  Take A.J. Hawk for example.  In a game earlier this year, Hawk decided to fly the Middle Finger flag- and only got docked $10,000.  Think about it man- if you just flip the bird when you're in the tunnel, instead of using that sweet, sultry baritone booming voice to thunder the old 'F.U.'- you'd most likely still have that $75,000 to spend on Twinkies.  Worst case scenario, you're only out $10,000.

Of course, it'd probably be best if you just handled it like your peers do.  After the game, charge across the field like a crazy-eyed Jack Nicholson, launch yourself into the air (as much as is possible after charging all the way across the field) and simply slam into the opponents coach- a la Jim Harbaugh/Schwartz.  That might be the least appropriate course of action, though.  After all, as a coach, you're expected to model acceptable behavior and model fine, upstanding citizenry.  And to do something like that would cost you way more than the $75,...wait, what?  They didn't get fined?  Never mind.  Break out the Sledgehammer.

Information regarding fines was used from several articles on NFL.com
PIC- Kirk- http://www.clevelandleader.com/files/Kirk%20Herbstreit.jpg
Christian- http://www.nypost.com/r/nypost/blogs/popwrap/200809/Images/200809_christian_siriano41.jpg

The Least Likely to Succeed: The actual

A couple of weeks ago (closer to a month, but still countable in weeks), I promised to deliver you a rendering of that one time when someone actually set my words to type and sent them around the globe.  Today, I come to honor that promise.  The long awaited world-wide Internet presentation of: The Least Likely to Succeed!

Despite the constant cringing and incessant temptations to change things (minimally at times, often drastically), I have decided to present the essay in its pure, undistilled form.  And....here it is.

Non can foretell what will come to pass, if we take this road or that.  But it seems to me not clear which road that we must take.  The westward road seems easiest.  Therefore it must be shunned....Now at this last we must take a hard road, a road unforseen.  There lies our hope, if hope it be.  To walk into peril- to Mordor.  We must send the ring to the fire- Elrond

In the midst of the excitement of seeing The Lord of the Rings masterfully translated onto the big screen (although in truth I was more versed in The Hobbit as a child), it is important to remember that Tolkien's work is not just entertainment but an extension of who he was.  Try as we might, we cannot fully separate entertainment from reality because entertainment is really just an outlet of creative expression of who we are.  Whether it is music, or acting, or writing, as an artist it is impossible to completely sunder who we are from what we want to portray. 

The Lord of the Rings is no exception.  I don't claim to know what J.R.R. Tolkien intended in his writing, nor do I know what he was thinking.  What I do know is that Tolkien was a Christian man who could not separate his Christianity from his writings.  The Lord of the Rings is an unbelievably well designed tale, with depth that very few stories have ever attempted and stirring of the imagination that few stories ever achieve.  Reading The Lord of the Rings is like taking a trip to another world, a world with it's own extensive history and stories of it's own.  When reading, the reader feels not only that Middle-earth actually exists, but that they are actually there.

However, the Lord of the Rings text contains more than a story; it is filled with Christian parallels.  Indeed, reading the Trilogy has helped me in my Christian walk, in that I've been able to see some things in a different light.  Things such as understanding God as the King, creation (from The Silmarillion), and the corruption of sin.  These are things I knew about, but by applying Christian principles to Tolkien's work, I have gained an even greater understanding and appreciation for them.

The One Ring serves to show us the power and enticement of sin.  Sauron is very much a form of Satan, pure evil and hatred personified, as opposed to the typical watered down Dr. Evil type of villain ("I'm holding the world ransom for one million dollars!").  Sauron, like Satan, does not merely desire to rule the world; he desires to completely annihilate all that is good.

But ultimately, every element of the story serves to compliment one central theme: final victory over evil.  In The Lord of the Rings, this theme is embodied in Frodo's quest to destroy the One Ring.  In Christianity, it is the death and resurrection of Christ to defeat Sin and Satan. 

There are three Christ-types in the story (according to my count; there may be more): Aragorn, the victorious King, the healer, the social outcast whose return marks the end of the age and ushers in a period of peace; Gandalf, the wise wizard, the Istari sent by the Ainur to guide the protect men, who gave his live to save his companions from the evil demon Balrog; and Frodo.

Aragorn is the image of Christ's return.  We first meet up with Aragorn in the Bree, under the guise of a Ranger named Strider.  Strider is suspicious at best and has the appearance of someone who is up to no good.  As the saga unfolds, however, more of Aragorn's kingly nature shines through, climaxing at his daring adventure through the Paths of the Dead.  Much of Aragorn's life is fulfillment of prophecy.  In addition to his jaunt through the Paths of the Dead, Aragorn turns out to have 'healing hands', which only the King returning is said to have.  His reign on the throne ushers in the beginning of the fourth age, a peaceful age.

Gandalf could be said to be the one who illustrates Christ's death.  Just as Jesus was sent to help people find God (both through His life and His death), Gandalf was sent by the Ainur (who were sent by Ilu'vatar to be gods of Middle Earth) to help all beings of a good heart.  More than a man, but less than the Ainur, Gandalf has some power allotted to him, but only within the confines of Middle-Earth.  When the fellowship is trapped in the Mines of Moria by a Balrog, Gandalf lays his life aside to battle it, and falls "into shadow".  Gandalf defeats the demon and emerges from the confrontation, changed, more powerful and wise.  Gandalf the Grey has become Gandalf the White, much like the Lamb who was slain is now the King of Kings and Lord of Lords.

There are two follies to avoid.  To use this [Ring] is perilous.  At this hour, to send it into the hands of a witless halfling into the land of the enemy himself, as you have done...that's madness- Denethor

Frodo is the most unlikely Christ-type of all.  Aragorn had the credentials of being a descendant of the Dunedain, the greatest of all the race of men.  Gandalf was a wizard, given great power with which to battle against the forces of Sauron.  But Frodo?  He was a hobbit, which was mockingly called halfling by other people.  Most of the tales of of lore in Middle-earth don't even allow for the existence of the little people, especially the tales involving heroic deeds and valor.

As the story begins, Frodo seems to be caught in the wrong place at the wrong time.  His adopted father (and cousin also) Bilbo, who found the Ring while on an adventure with dwarves, had reached the ripe old age of eleventy-one, or one hundred and eleven years old if you prefer.  Reaching a point in life where he was starting to "feel like butter spread across too much bread," Bilbo set out to Rivendell and left the Ring in the keeping of Frodo.  This occurrence just happened to coincide with the reemergence of Sauron in Mordor.  Sauron had discovered that the One Ring was in circulation and began to draw evil to Mordor in anticipation of his retainment of the Ring and subsequent destruction of Middle-earth.

One of my favorite scenes from the movie occurs shortly after Frodo discovers the nature of the Ring.  Gandalf is leaving to counsel with Saruman while Frodo and Sam are setting out to Bree.  Gandalf tells Frodo that the Ring "wants to be found" by the Dark Lord.  It became clear at that moment that Frodo wanted no part of this quest.

Thus we return once more to the destroying of the Ring, and yet we come no nearer.  What strength have we for the finding of the Fire in which it was made?  This is the path of despair.  Of folly, I would say...-Erestor
I said victory could not be achieved by arms.  I still hope for victory, but not by arms- Gandalf

After a close call with the Ringwraiths (former kings of men who succumbed to the power of the Ring to become Sauron's slaves), Frodo arrived at Rivendell, the house of Elrond.  There several leaders met, representing the Dwarves, Elves, and Men, to figure out exactly what course of action to take in regards to the Ring.  At the council, every conceivable plan seemed doomed to failure against the powers of darkness.  A battle of arms would be futile, for Sauron's forces far outnumbered those of Gondor and its allies.

The Ring could not be hidden, as Rivendell had insufficient power to resist Mordor, and the other strongholds were even less resistant.  Even throwing the Ring into the Sea, which would at least buy valuable time, would only delay the inevitable.  The Ring could only be destroyed in the fires of Orodruin, Mount Doom.  Even that course of action seemed folly, because Mount Doom was located in the very heart of Mordor, the stronghold of Sauron.  In truth, no course of action seemed any better than the other because all seemed destined to fail, to the complete ruin of Middle-earth.  With that in mind, the wise were forced to make a decision to choose the best path in the interests of all the free peoples.  They chose to destroy the Ring in Mordor.

Why do you speak ever of hiding and destroying?  Why should we not think that the great Ring has come into our hands to serve us in the very hour of need- Boromir

What was he thinking?  The council had to be filled with doubts and 'what-ifs' when the decision was made.  Even those who had the most faith in the mission couldn't feel too secure in the thought of taking Sauron's Ring, which wanted to join with him, into his acropolis unprotected.  It would have been impossible to take a sizable force into Mordor undetected.  Neither Gandalf nor Elrond, the wisest and most powerful of the council, could bear the Ring for fear of the potential danger they would wield.  After listening to Boromir, nobody was ready to completely trust Gondor with it.  After a period of thoughtful consideration, Frodo felt the call to bear the Ring into Mordor.

Despair or folly?  It is not despair, for despair is only for those who see the end beyond all doubt.  We do not.  It is wisdom to recognize necessity, when all other courses have not been weight, though as folly it may appear to those who cling to false hope.  Well, let folly be our cloak, a veil before the eyes of the enemy!  For he is very wise, and weights all things to a nicety in the scales of his malice.  But the only measure he knows is desire, desire for power, and so he judges all hearts.  Into his thought will not enter that any will refuse it, that having the Ring we may seek to destroy it.  If we seek this, we shall put him out of reckoning- Gandalf

To make the long trilogy of books short, the Ring is destroyed in the end, in spite of what seemed to be overwhelming odds.  The plan which seemed to defy all wisdom, in the end, provided a victory that was not only final but satisfying in the sense that the victory was accomplished beyond all reasoning, via means that Sauron didn't even account for.

Jesus also went on a Ring-quest.  In fact, Frodo's quest is remarkably similar to Christ's life.

The fact that Jesus chose to lay aside His Godhood to become a man like us is against logic, kind of like trusting the fate of Middle-earth in the hands of a halfling.  Jesus, as Creator of the world, probably could have chosen from any of a million different ways to reconcile men to Himself, and could have saved Himself a lot of pain and sorrow.  Instead, He chose to show us how much He loved us.  With that in mind, there was only one course of action to take, no matter how foolish it seems to us.  The God of love had to bring about reconciliation through the greatest act of love He could have shown: to lay down His life.

In our wisdom, God's decision to take the form of man and live among us is hard to comprehend.  But it's what Jesus chose to do with His life that really confounds most people (Isaiah 55:8- For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord).

Instead of flaunting His Godhood and setting up the Kingdom of Heaven on Earth, Jesus became the servant extraordinaire.  He showed remarkable self-sacrifice, frequently laying down His rights and desires for the good of others.  Jesus even humbled Himself to the point of washing His disciples feet!

Jesus also said things that clashed with traditional thinking.  Jesus said that the poor in spirit were blessed, as were those who were persecuted.  He said that in order to gain life it had to be lost.  In the mind of Christ, it was better to lose everything to gain eternal life than to gain the whole world and lose our soul.  In the Kingdom of God, the last shall be first.  These are some examples of radical words from Jesus, who spent His life on Earth going against everything that man said was wisdom and truth.

1 Corinthians 3:19- For the wisdom of the world is foolishness in God's sight.  As it is written: 'He catches the wise in their craftiness' and again, 'The Lord knows that the thoughts of the wise are futile'.

 However, none of the things He did while He lived on Earth flew in the face of human reason the way His death did.  Indeed, His very mission in life was to die.  His disciples were confused because they thought Jesus wasn't advancing His "political agenda" enough.  The people were confused because they saw the Man who saved others and chose not to save Himself.  The Pharisees were confused because the man who openly challenged their self-righteous, dead religion go quietly to death without so much as a word of defense.  Even to the end, Jesus chose to go against the norm, choosing humility, self-sacrifice, and obedience over power, self-preservation, and rebellion.

And that is why the quest to destroy the Ring is the central theme, not only in The Lord of the Rings, but in our lives.  It is as if the King, the Istari, became the halfling and chose to bear each of our rings into Mordor, so that we don't have to.  The life of Christ may not make sense to us.  But one thing is for sure: with the victory He as purchased, it doesn't have to.

1 Corinthians 1: 18-23, 25- For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.  For it is written: 'I will destroy the wisdom of the wise; the intelligence of the intelligent I will frustrate'.  Where is the wise man?  Where is the scholar?  Where is the philosopher of this age?  Has God not made foolish the wisdom of the world?  For since in the wisdom of God the world through its wisdom did not know him, God was pleased that through the foolishness of what was preached to save those who believe.  For the foolishness of God is wiser than man's wisdom, and the weakness of God is stronger than man's strength.



Well, there you have it.  If you made it all the way through until the end, congratulations.  You have must have Wolverine-like healing and regeneration skills- at least in the eye and brain area.  Even though I was able to resist the urge to basically revamp it completely, that doesn't mean that I'm not going to be discussing my thoughts on it.  But that will come another day.  Hopefully another day next week.

Tim Tebow: Savior- or saviorest?

If you even thought about accessing any sort of media relating somehow to sports, then you surely know that yesterday was Tim Tebow's first start of the season.  And I'm gonna take him to task.

I actually have nothing against Tebow- from what I've read/heard, he's a fine and upstanding young man, a devout Christian, and an excellent teammate.  Tebow has done humanity a solid.  His parents should be proud.

He definitely doesn't deserve most of the venom being spewed towards him.  You can't blame Denver for reaching to draft Tebow in the first round.  He (probably) didn't ask the fans to start cheering for him when Kyle Orton's career started to tailspin.  It's definitely not his fault that everyone everywhere nitpicking his football career the past two weeks- talking about how inaccurate he is, why he is inaccurate, how his arm isn't strong enough, how his arm is strong enough, how he needs an offense specifically tailored to his skill set, how he needs to be a pocket passer, how he isn't ever going to be a pocket passer, his intangibles...and I didn't even actually read most of the articles- this is all information gleaned from headlines and the NFL pregame shows that I watched today. 

I understand why this is- we're like information sponges, and the Internet is Bikini Bottom.  Bill Simmons has talked before about the culture of the Internet, and the 24 hour news cycle, and because there's so much more air time to fill, things get analyzed and reanalyzed, and the analysis gets analyzed and so on and so on.  And of course I could rip on the process...but using my own blog to do so would be a little hypocritical.  I just don't believe that you should bite the hand that feeds you (especially since most of the time it's my own hand). 

I do think that this over-overanalyzation had a ridiculous impact on the development of young players.  Head coaches too, but I'm not talking about coaches here- I'm talking about the man Tim Tebow.  I remember as a kid reading this book of NFL player profiles from the early 1980's.  One of the player profiles was Bert Jones, a young QB for the Baltimore Colts, and his head coach made a comment akin to QBs taking about five years to really fully understand the NFL game. 

Every time I stumble across an article about Tebow or see him being virtually dissected, I think about that quote.  I think about Tim Tebow, starting for the 4th or 5th time in the 2nd year of his NFL career, and I think it's absolutely preposterous that people would be trying to make declarative statements about his football future at this stage in his career.  Especially since everybody knew that Tebow was going to be a project coming out of the funky spread offense that Florida ran.  But hey, we have to fill the air time, so let's keep talking and talking and let's run this kid's career into the ground before it even gets started.  Poor Timmy.

But enough about that.  On to the game!

Full disclosure- I didn't actually get to watch Tebow play very much yesterday.  Apparently 1-4 Denver at 0-5 Miami didn't really make for must-see TV, Tebow or no Tebow.  So I watched San Diego at New York (the Lions were on, but I couldn't stand to watch them suck).  Ergo, my discussion of Tebow will be mostly academic.

I know that his passing numbers were so-so.  I know that he led the Denver offense to within field goal range a couple times in the first half but the Denver kicker missed a couple of field goals.  I know that Tebow led the Broncos from 15 points down in the last 3 minutes of the game (thanks on-side kick team!) and then about half-way through the OT period the defense delivered a turnover that eventually led to a 52 yard game winning field goal.  I know that after the game they interviewed Tebow and he thanked Jesus and then his teammates.

People with way more time and money on their hands are going to sit around and dissect the film of this game and be able to determine whether Tebow played good, great, or more great.  So I can't really comment on that.  He led them to a win, which is always a big deal in the NFL.  He's definitely an exciting player, if not slightly unorthodox.
 
What I want to focus on is his post game comments- particularly how they rubbed me the wrong way.
 
Maybe it's just because I'm a little older, a little wiser, or maybe I'm about to get ungrafted from the Vine- but I really wasn't feeling the shout-out to JC.  Far be it for me to make any sort of judgments or assumptions or mind-readings, but it really felt forced.  It was like Tim spent all week with a series of post-it-notes around his house that said "If get interviewed, thank Jesus Christ Personal Savior". 
 
I don't have any problem with athletes being outspoken about their faith- as long as its in context.  If you're speaking to a bunch of church camp kids- yeah, tell them about your faith.  If you're telling a reporter why you set up this charity or that fundraiser- sure, that's appropriate.  If the NFL analysts are asking you about game situations- you should probably leave God out of it.  Especially since you just got sacked 7 times, went 13-27 passing, and spent most of the game struggling against the worst defense since Helms Deep.
 
I don't know- I just think that it's okay to talk about football when they ask you football questions.  If you repped Christ because you're wanting to stay humble, try looking at your statistics instead.  Plenty there to keep yourself in perspective.  If you name-dropped Jesus because you wanted Him to get proper praise and glory, try going 31-35 for 325 yards and 5 TDs.  But don't take my word for it:
 
-If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. If anyone plays quarterback, he should complete at least 60% of his passes with an average yards/attempt of about 7-8, and a 3-1 TD-to-INT ration.  To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen- 1 Peter 4:11 (Bolded part was not part of the original manuscripts.  Or any of the manuscripts, for that matter)
 
That's all I got.  I don't know if it's good enough, but thanks to the Internet we have nothing but time to kill and space to fill.  I do hope that Tebow does well- I like to see the good guys succeed and the underdogs prove their doubters wrong.  I'm also partial to left-handed QBs  TTFN!

Happy International Blasphemy Day!

Thanks to tumblr and Google, I learned something new today.  And let me tell you, what a relief!  I haven't learned anything new in like a week, and I was afraid that I was just going to have to throw in the learning towel and go live in Mississippi. 

Anyways, one of my tumblr peeps posted a picture of a piece of poop with a halo and tagged it #international blasphemy day.  Curiosity piqued, I went and googled it.  And I learned what International Blasphemy Day is all about.  The end.

If you want to read about it for yourselves, go here.  If you just like to have someone tell you what to think, then allow me to explain it in simple terms- INTERNATIONAL BLASPHEMY DAY IS TEH DEVUL!!!1!!!

It started as a protest over some Muslim fall-out over some anti-Muhammad cartoons published in a Danish newspaper.  I didn't know that the Danish made newspapers- I thought they just made delicious fruit-filled pastries.  Seriously, it actually sounds like a worthwhile cause.  I actually have no problems with this the observation of this day- for 3 reasons:

1) I believe strongly in freedom of speech and freedom of religion
Whether you believe that we were created as free-willed moral agents or just monkeys that evolved higher consciousness, you should at least agree that each person should have the right to speak their mind and believe what they want to believe.  And if not, then just get out.  Leave.  Right now.

Now obviously there is (I believe) a need for people to have educated opinions and beliefs- but that doesn't mean that I believe people should have conditional rights in these areas. 

The International Blasphemy Day is "a day to support free speech, support the right to criticize and satirize religion, and to oppose any resolutions or laws, binding or otherwise, that discourage or inhibit free speech of any kind" (from that one site that I linked that you probably didn't read).  Will some people will probably take it too far into the offensive realm?  Sure.  But I believe that there are other people that look from the outside in and are able to see the flaws in our religious belief systems that most of us are too close to see.  When we censor the ability of people to do this, we will definitely cut out the annoying squeaky wheels of opposition.  But we'll also eliminate the voices of those who can help us to develop a more meaningful faith system by causing us to take stock of what our faith system looks like.

2) Blasphemy is largely (in my opinion) a socially constructed issue.
In The Count of Monte Cristo, Colonel Villefort says this great line to his son when they learn of Napolean's escape from Alba- "Treason is all a matter of dates".  I feel the same way about blasphemy.  Things that some people in other countries find deathly offensive are run-of-the-mill jokes on our television channels.  Things that get our blood boiling might cause endorphin release for someone else. 

To me, blasphemy is strongly related to the idea of the God Card.  Did you ever play Rock/Paper/Scissors- and have some snot nosed, brat-faced kid come up with The Nuke?  So you have Paper covering Rock, Rock smashing Scissors, Scissors cutting Paper, and The Nuke just blowing everything to smithereens?  How is that fair?  You cheated!  I hate this game, it sucks- leave me alone mom!!!!

And we're back.

That's the God Card.  It's the card we play when we want to win an argument or make our actions above reproach in our minds.  Quit a job?  "God told me to do it".  Get a divorce?  "After our argument, Jon and Kate came on...it was a sign...".  Blow up an abortion clinic?  "God said 'Git 'er done".  Wife who committed adultery?  "Everybody must get stoned".

Blasphemy is the tool of the God Card.  The God Card gets played, and if it is not adhered to, then the next step is the Blasphemy Bloody Knuckles. Blasphemy in my mind is mostly about maintaining order and the status quo.  It keeps people in line and stops them from forcing certain issues or pressing into new territory out of fear of the social repercussions.

The problem, as I alluded to before, is that blasphemy is just a matter of dates.  Because eventually someone comes along that successfully challenges the powers that be and changes the mold.  They called Jesus a blasphemer.  Said the same about Galileo and Martin Luther.  And yet, these three men played significant roles in upsetting the preheld notions and causing social revolution.  Because people eventually realized that they had valuable things to say, regardless of how much they had rocked the boat.

3) Blasphemy is more of an attitude of the heart than an act of the flesh.
I push the envelope.  Or is it that I use envelopes?  I can never remember.

Ask my wife or those who get close enough to get past my facade.  I say things that might be considered to be risque'.  Nothing too crazy, mind you- but things that would probably cause some people to turn their heads, raise their eyebrows, and shoot me with the hate rays.

I was talking to a friend last winter about this.  We had just got done sharing a laugh about something outrageous and probably inappropriate.  Looking back, I'm thankful that we weren't been struck by lightning.  After our laughter subsided, a legitimate discussion was sparked and we came to the conclusion that blasphemy is much more of a heart condition than it is one of outward actions.  I think that God understands that when I say things, I'm not saying them out of a spiteful rebellion.  I think He knows that I love to find humor in situations where humor might not be apparent.  I think He realizes that He created me this way, and I'm not an asset that He's ready to liquidate quite yet.  I'm kind of banking on that, actually.

Look at how Jesus spoke to the pharisees- they did and said all the 'right' things, and yet Jesus treated them with the kind of contempt one might normally reserve for the New York Yankees.  His disciples picked grain on the Sabbath and he was cool with that.  This tells me that the Jesus Justice scale isn't calibrated to ours.  Could it be that God looks at our hearts and not our outward actions?  I feel like I've read that somewhere....

Oh wait.  I have.  It's in the Bible.



When it's all said and done, we need people in this world who are brave enough to confront the ideas and beliefs of the majority- no matter what those ideas might be.  Challenge can bring discovery which can bring change which can lead to health, happiness, and hope.  Obviously some people will blaspheme just to push buttons and to be idiots- but some religious people just try to push buttons and to be idiots.  See?  We aren't so different. 

Let us never be so afraid to question that which we hold to be so infallibly true that we devalue the existence of those who do not feel the same way.  We can hold our beliefs tightly without losing a grip on our shared humanity.  And if we loosen up a little and look at things from a different window- well, we might see things in a new light that strengthens our faith and makes us better people.  I call that:

PIC- Dogs- http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2008/10/6/128677868549452426.jpg
Sheen- http://www.twisted-news.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/Charlie-Sheen-Winning.jpg

Action Jackson

Yesterday, Fourth of July's Eve, I had one of those moments where I was able to take words that I had 'known' before and connect them like a virtual puzzle in my mind and have one of those light bulb moments, where you really understand something- not just on a cognitive "I can dictionarily define all of those words" but on a "Oh. OH. I get it!" type of scale.

And as is my custom in these here parts, I am going to bring my moment of brilliance to the web. So now it becomes your brilliance. See? Isn't sharing a good thing? Just make sure I get all the royalties.

Let me start this party off with a verse. It's a verse that the Lord gave to me while we were praying before service yesterday. Actually, it wasn't an entire verse. And quite honestly, it could have just been an amalgam of some teaching stuff we were listening to on Saturday night and the awesome t-shirt idea that my worship team comrades have. Regardless, here it is:

Isaiah 61:10- I delight greatly in the LORD; my soul rejoices in my God. For he has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of his righteousness, as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels.

The idea here is that if we are clothed with God's righteousness (Galations 3:27), then God doesn't see us when he looks at us- He sees Christ. It's like when Frodo and Sam donned the Orc garb when they were walking through Mordor, except it doesn't look like our parents mated with the guys from Spy vs. Spy

Anyways, that's the backdrop. So fast forward a tiny bit. Charlie starts talking about grace. Not the grace that we flash when the morality officer asks us if we have a license to sin, but the grace that gives us power over sin.

And that's when it hit me- what we do doesn't really matter!

That's right folks- throw out everything you've learned about how to be bad and good- it's all rubbish. Actually...don't throw it all away. We'll probably use some of it later. That was a rash statement on my part. Let's just set it aside for now and pretend like I didn't say that.

Now I expound.

There's a doctrine that is fundamental to some, which states that humanity is inherently sinful. That people are born evil, wretched beings. I don't subscribe wholly to that- I do believe that there is good in all of us as well as evil. But let's face it- most of us are not John Lennon- or even Paul McCartney. Most of us are more like Ringo.

For the sake of argument, we're going to just go with the idea of humanity having an inherently sinful core (I'll explain why later). So whether we follow all the rules to a 't' or break them all with our fists of fury, then we still have the same internal processor- and it's churning out sin at lots of gigahertz (sorry- I know just enough about computer terms to totally use them poorly). Sin, then, is not something that we do- it's who we are.

'Great. That's it then. Throw in the towel'

That doesn't completely render the system of morality obsolete. There are reasons to do the right thing. The series of 'rights' and 'wrongs' help us to make sense of the world. It helps us to navigate the myriad of situations we encounter. All of us have animalistic instincts and needs- the need to feed, the need to procreate, the need to exert our dominance and protect what is ours- the need to survive. But as humans, we have the ability to exist with each other in a way that transcends those needs. We can grocery shop with other people without having to bring a club to beat off the others. We can walk along the beach without mating with every gorgeous blond in a two piece that we see. And we can survive without having to kill others to make sure that happens. Morality makes that possible.

By and large, each culture has a moral structure that determines what sorts of things are 'right' and what sorts of things are 'wrong'. Those ideas are hopefully passed on from generation to generation, and if they're not then there are systems set in place (such as the legal system) to make sure that people toe the line.

What is my point? Well, my point is that we all have a sense of right and wrong that is handed down to us from external sources. Along with this is the implication that there are benefits to behaving well, and consequences for behaving poorly. So as children, we are subtly taught that life is a game. To win the game, you play by the rules. Do more 'right' than wrong' and you're gold.

The problem with this system is clear- if our goodness is truly determined by the weight of our actions against each other, then Christ's sacrifice was pointless. There would be no need for God to clothe us in His righteousness, because on our own we could just do something to overcome or blot out our bad actions. If our sinful actions could cause us to be unrighteous, then couldn't we earn righteousness when we do good?

Am I right? Or am I crazy. Answer- both.

But if the issue of righteousness and sin is not one of external behavior, but of internal composition- well then, that's something completely different. The things we do have no real significance in relation to our spirituality- it doesn't matter what I do and what I don't do. I'm still a sinful man. Killing goats doesn't change that. Helping old ladies cross the street doesn't change that. And cheating on my taxes doesn't change that. Sin is encased in my genetic code.

That's why Christ came. He didn't just come so our sins could be forgiven. He came so our sinful essence could be completely wiped out and replaced with His righteousness.

See, when Christ comes into us, there is a fundamental shift in our being. We become a new person. 2 Corinthians 5:17. Look it up. BAM. Now just because the hardware is all new, that doesn't mean that we upload a completely new operating system- the Christian life is all about learning how to walk in that newness. It's one of the disadvantages of not being robots- our old programming is not just rebooted. It gradually gets weeded out as we keep learning and keep growing. It may not make for efficient computers, but it makes for fascinating television.

This is why I believe that Paul talked about Christ like He is oxygen and not like a behavior checklist. Jesus didn't come to change our actions. He came to change us. Completely. So that's why he needed so badly to know Christ. Not so he could behave better as a human being, but so that He could live as Christ did. It may seem like semantics, but it's an entirely different ball game.

It's not about what movies I watch, or whether or not I play video games or take my kids out Trick-or-treating on Halloween. It's about two things:
1) Will I love God with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength?
2) Will I love my neighbor like I love myself? (Matthew 22:37-40)

Now we don't just disregard the teachings of right and wrong. I'm not promoting anarchy. I'm not saying 'if it feels good, do it'. Usually there is a decent reason for the morality that we are taught, and none of us live in vacuums. Our behaviors, right and wrong, have consequences not only for us but for those around us. But on a whole, my actions don't matter. I don't need to go to church to have someone tell me what I should and shouldn't be doing. If I'm going to church, then I should be learning how to know Christ and be a blessing to other people. Life is not some sort of quantitative exercise, where we evaluate our existence based on some formula that determines our rating. We do the best we can. We live, we love, we hurt others. We're not perfect. We fall short. It's beautiful.

So teach the children what is right and what is wrong. Tell them how to live in this life. But more importantly, teach them to love God- and to love other people as they love themselves. Do that, and they'll be gold.

Pics- Frodo and Sam- http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v327/ShirelingUK/JOURNEY/CH%2017%20MT%20DOOM/limitededitionrotk185.jpg
Ringo- http://www.wearysloth.com/Gallery/ActorsS/16419-3123.gif

Cedar Point 2.11

I'm going to say something and it's probably going to make you jealous. More jealous of me than you probably already are.

I went to Cedar Point last week. Yeah, that's right. I said it. I don't feel bad.

Of course, this wasn't your average, everyday trip to Cedar Point. When you are me, you don't take time to plan out a luxurious trip with plenty of time on both sides to get ready and enough time to enjoy the whole of the Cedar Point experience. You fly by the seat of your pants and tag along with your folks at the last minute. Because let's face it- that's just how I roll. The flip side of that spontaneity is that it takes a week to recover. It's exactly a week to the day since we were walking the hallowed pavement of Cedar Point- and I'm just now starting to feel myself again. Lucky you guys- there's a weeks worth of Jason Parks buildup that I plan to spray all over your faces!

In the interests of gloating/creating a virtual memoir of an amazing trip, I am now going to blog my trip.

June 20th
-The trip starts off with me, at my folks house, stirring in bed, thinking (perhaps hoping) that it is well past 10:00 a.m. So I roll over, grab my phone, allow my eyes to adjust, check the time...8:24. Wow. So it's going to be one of those days.
-After some time in the pool, we get ready and hop on the road. My serious control issues with driving rear their head again. Not while my dad is driving- he drove enough during my formative years to permanently give him a free pass as a driver. No, it was the other two drivers that had to incur my wrath- Mom and Josh. My mom has been driving for longer than I've been alive. And while my brother hasn't, he's also logged some time behind the wheel. But nonetheless, it didn't stop me from sitting in the back seat white-knuckling for virtually the whole time. Sorry guys!
-Not that my mom and brother were flawless behind the wheel. My mom almost got forced off the road a couple times by semis trying to change lanes. Maybe it isn't just Nebraska, Mom...
-And my brother almost took us off the road while playing the letter search game. I know 'J' is hard to find, bro. But I would like to live to find 'K'. And 'L'. And whatever letters come after that.
-When we finally arrived safe and sound in Sandusky (Thanks be to God, no thanks be to the crazy drivers that live in my family), we had to wait around for like an hour while my sister got off of work. And since Delaney and I were trying to surprise her, that basically means we had to hide in the lobby for about an hour- since she was going to be getting off of work 'any minute'. Well, news flash folks- I'm a large man. It's difficult for me to find spaces to hide. And when I do find a space, chances are I have had to contort myself very uncomfortably to get there. And if I am uncomfortable- then the world is uncomfortable.
-But hey- this happened. So that made all the waiting and hiding and contorting and cursing worthwhile.
-After we (finally- JEEZ) picked up Jenny, we went to this place called 'Mona Pizza'.

Smoking hot, right? And she's not bad looking either. ZING!

All I need to tell you about this place is that they have a pizza that incorporates mashed potatoes, cheese, and bacon. Yeah.
-I think I might like to live in Sandusky. In addition to the amusement park and my new favorite pizza place, they have an Olive Garden, a Toys 'R Us, and this one Cleaning Complex that had a dry cleaners, a pet wash, a car wash, and a laundry man- all in one. Woah! If cleanliness is next to Godliness, then Sandusky is a stone's throw away from Heaven.
-Of course, all good things must end. Come to find out, we were staying in a 1 star hotel. At least, that's what Random Dude In The Hallway said. I don't know how all they figure out hotel ratings. All I know is that there was no fridge, no nuker, no elevator, crappy AC, and Cleveland sports on the TV. Come to think of it, I'd be surprised if it even got 1 star.

Side tangent: The name of the place was America's Best Value Inn. That should have been the tip off right there. In my experience, if a hotel has words like 'Economy', 'Budget', 'Value'- then those are just buzz words for 'Cheap' and 'Donuts For Breakfast'. And when you combine those terms with the word 'Inn'...well, let's just say that when Mary and Joseph were looking for a place to stay, the place they went to immediately after the inn turned them away was an animal stable. Sure, maybe I didn't have to shack up with a horse. But I did have to share a bed with my brother. Is that any better? It's like Jane Goodall having to share a bed with one of her gorilla friends. But without so much hair.

June 21st
-Delaney. Thanks a lot for getting us all up at FREAKING 6 IN THE MORNING!!! And then falling back asleep after we were all too awake to do the same.

Precious moment? No. Not really.

-The actual day itself was pretty much a blur. Lots of walking around. Lots of rides. Well, not for me. I was too portly to go on the Wicked Twister and the Woodstock Express (which, to be fair, is a children's ride), so I was pretty much defeated at that point. Besides, for me it was more about allowing my daughter to experience Cedar Point for the first time. That, my friends, was a success.
Delaney's first ride was a Merry-go-round, which is a lot like when I went to Canada for the first time and wanted to eat at Taco Bell. But she did well, and went on lots of really cool rides- some of which you can't even find at fairgrounds! One thing I noticed- kids are fearless. Roller coaster? No problem. Power Tower? She probably would have if they (and I) would have let her. I remember being similar when I first went to Cedar Point in 4th grade (probably a little more afraid than she was). I know there's a scientific/psychological reason for this. But I'm not going to talk about that now. I'm just going to tell you my daughter has tiger blood and Adonis DNA and leave it at that.
-Your name is Marcus Bulgaria? (Inside joke)
-It's pretty wild to see that many people intersecting in one place- thousands of stories from across the world, meeting here to enjoy a day of fun and death-defying. And yet, we're not really intersecting. We're all just there to do our thing. Sure, we might see people multiple times in the park (why is it that some people stand out more to us than other people in that setting?) but really, they are just background filler.
-It must suck to be an employee working on the rides. Because obviously what they do is remove your heart and replace it with a battery. Seriously, those people are like robots. All of us paying customers are having the time of our lives and the employees are rocking hard-core poker faces. I know, I know- lots of repetition+tedious jobs+bitterness=hard-core poker face. But still- I think they really turn them into robots. Just be careful Jenny when they ask you to go "downstairs", don't go down the dark, dimly lit tunnel lined with the pipes. Run away.
- Famous Daves. Wonderful, WONDERFUL food.

And a random piece of toast

Beef brisket. Ribs. Chicken. Corn on the cob. Baked beans. Cornbread muffins. WOW. Delicious. I see now why Dave is Famous. I wasn't so sure at first. I mean, I had never heard of him. How famous could he be? But then I thought about it, and realized that maybe he's just a kindred spirit- a fellow narcissist who hit it big. So I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. And boy oh boy, am I glad I did!

My brother is totally checking Lucy out.

June 22nd
-The trip comes to an end. We go home with 0 casualties and tons o' fun. If I had to do it over again? I would. But I would go down a couple days earlier and stay a day or two longer.

The coolest part of the trip? Seeing how the relationship between my two kids has developed. Whenever we would call down to talk to Mommy, Delaney was like 'Um, yeah, sure, whatever, let me talk to Shane'. And then her and Shane would just talk and talk and talk. Same thing when I was talking to Shane on the phone. "Hi daddy, I wanna talk to Delaney". Hey thanks Shane. Love you too.

But really, this trip is not about Cedar Point. This trip was a validation of how awesome my family is- both the family I am a son to and the family I am the man of. Obviously I am the common denominator, and so it's most likely my residual awesomeness that has contaminated everyone else. But still- they're awesome! We're awesome! I AM AWESOME!!!

We want our change like a tax refund- high profit, low effort

I imagine that the thought process of myself is like a railway system. Each thought is like a train depot, and each train is the neuron that connects the thoughts. The passengers are the links between my thoughts. Instead of a system of train tracks, there is a series of magic portals. A train will be at one depot and then all of a sudden *POOF* it's at another one, and then *POOF* it's somewhere else now with a series of new thoughts that are all somehow linked together. You think I'm brilliant now? Wait til I get going! (I've used that hyperlink idea before, but it's so funny that it deserves a sequel)

My best bud Charlie (I'm totally playing up the level of our friendship in hopes that he'll notice me) and I were talking about the child abuse statistics of Marquette County this morning, and how he's going to present that as a challenge to the pastors and people at tonight's FireUp: Encounter service. Having worked with abused and neglected kids for over four years, I know first hand a taste of the dire need that population has. The church has surely made an impact- but things are getting worse, not better, and so Charlie feels the need to shake the tree a little bit.

When I got home, I started thinking about the concept of child abuse/neglect as a solvable problem and wondered if it is. I mean, it's such a multi-faceted issue. You have to take into account macro-level factors like unemployment rates and cost of living. Then you factor in the mezzo-level stuff- open or isolated community, direct support network, family relationships. Finally, it comes down to each individual person and their issues- mental health, physical, emotional, spiritual. Oh, and don't forget the unique challenges that come from not only raising a child- but raising that specific child.

So right now, I can't think of a solution that could completely eliminate child abuse and neglect. We can fight it, combat it, knock it down a little bit. But it's a systemic issue that isn't going to change right this second.

Then I started thinking about the concept of change in general. And how it is too big. Too wide. Too broad. Too quick.

One of my favorite anecdotal stories is the one where the guy throws the starfish back into the ocean. I hyperlinked it so that you didn't have to suffer through my inevitable slaughtering of the story. Just know that it's a huge keystone in my own personal philosophy of life.

Then I started thinking about Jesus and His life on Earth. And I realized something else- that not even the life of Jesus changed the whole world. Let that idea sink in a little bit: Not even the life of Jesus changed the whole world.

Now I don't mean that in a blasphemous way at all- obviously Jesus' time on Earth has had an enormous impact. But did the whole world get saved when He was kicking it in Jerusalem? Did all the Christian churches that have ever existed suddenly spring up as He walked around in Nazareth? No. And I'm pretty sure that Jesus would agree with me.

After all, didn't He leave it to His disciples to go out into all the world and preach the Gospel? Isn't that the reason the Holy Spirit came to Earth- to assist with the change process? Jesus gave sermons to multitudes and masses- but the most significant changes came in his interaction with individuals. If memory serves, most of the miracles Jesus performed were of a one-on-one variety. True, many times those miracles were an instantaneous change of their own right- instantly healed, instantly well, instantly delivered- but even those miracles served the worldwide societal change of turning the hearts of nations back to the Father in a gradual, life by life fashion.

And it makes sense, really. Think about the idea of massive change, or widespread change- it can be clumsy, unwieldy, and even be met with resistance. We want change- but when it comes, we often fight it. So change has to be a slow process. It's like building up an immunity to a poison...say, Iocaine Powder (second Princess Bride reference- I am literally on a roll right now). You don't just ingest a bunch of it at once- you take it in, bit by bit, until your body forgets that the odorless/tasteless/instantly dissolving in liquid substance that you just flavored your coffee with is actually among the most deadliest poisons known to man.

But we don't always want to wait for things to change. Especially right now, we live in a world where people want change so badly that they are literally trading their lives for it. And I don't mean to belittle the enormity of their sacrifice, nor say that it is a vain effort. Sometimes those things need to happen for change to happen.

But I look at our country, and how the government works to enact policies that define so much of the way that our lives progress. A new party comes into power, makes its policies, and basically waits for them to fail. Because we want that change you promised, we want it now- and obviously your policy isn't working, so it needs to go and you need to go as well.

That's why I wouldn't be surprised in the least if Barack Obama is a one-term president. I'm not trying to debate whether or not he should be- but I can definitely see it. He campaigned on the back of one idea- change. He promised change. Widespread change. Sweeping change.

And many people fell for it. What were they thinking? Did they think that Obama would be able to magically make all sorts of changes happen right away? And did they think that those changes that he did make would just all of a sudden happen? Again, I'm not speaking to his qualities as a Commander-in-Chief, but I'm speaking more to the expectations I feel that people had about his presidency before it even started (which in all fairness were largely fueled by the campaign promises that he made).

We can't sit around and wait for government programs and policies to be the change that we want to be in the world. That's like sitting around and watching the glaciers slowly move across the continent, except that sometimes a glacier will be suddenly *POOFED* away and replaced by a newer, shinier glacier that is surely just waiting its turn in the teleportation line.

I know that there are services and programs that do good things. I don't want to take away from them and their efforts. Again, as with my thoughts on organized religion, there are good things being done by places like a Teaching Family Homes or a Department of Human Services. There are worthy causes promoting societal change that are worthy to be invested in. But we have to be people willing to enact change in our own personal realm of influence. We have to understand that change is a process. And we have to be willing to have the patience to see that change through until the end.

2008 in review

Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be famines and earthquakes in various places. All these are the beginning of birth pains- Matthew 24:7-8 (NIV)

You'll hate us 'cause we'll never go away
And like some sort of fungus, we're growing every day
Our knuckles are dragging, I guess that means to say
Our message isn't stopping, till you drag us all away- Steins Theme, Project 86

Well, it's almost over. 2008 will go down in history as one of the worst years in existence. And you know what? I saw it coming. Well, not any specific events. It was more of a sense of extreme New years uncertainty, somewhat like Y2K. You all remember Y2K, don't you?

The difference here though is that Y2K was a buildup of fearful expectation BEFORE the New Year, and it was something that was a known quantity. When I awoke on New Years day 2008 (or maybe in the couple days following...I really need to get better at keeping track of things), I just had this looming sense of dreadful anticipation about the year. Of course, I found out I wasn't the only one at the first service of the year at Waters Edge church. The guy who spoke talked about having many of the same dubieties (this word has been brought to you by dictionary.com) that I had, and that he had talked to others with the same types of feelings! Whoa!

Now let me be clear, that I am not trying to equate myself as any sort of prophet or anything like that. I do fancy myself as someone who can read the writing on the wall, but I'm not a prognosticator, I'm not a fortune teller. I'm no Nostradamus, although I might be more handsome than he was...

Well, the jury is out on that, although his beard obviously puts mine to shame. But still, I'm just plain old me. And while I had nothing to go on but vague suspicions, you can imagine my surprise (and at times horror) when things played out according to my unclear hunch.

Floods in Iowa, a cyclone in Myanmar, earthquake in China. Hurricanes Gustav and Ike, Georgia and Russia in conflict. There were lighter calamaties as well- the Detroit Lions flirting with 0-16, Michigan football having their worst season in U-M history, the Tigers choke job. Back to serious reality, gas prices climbing to over $4 a gallon as the stock market was busy throwing our economy into Depressionesque territory. And it even carried through the holidays, with the Thanksgiving Mumbai terrorist attack, and December Israeli airstrikes. There was also a guy who dressed up as Santa and killed 9 people on Christmas eve.

Is this Doomsday? Man I hope not! I've got 2 little kids, and the prospect of Revelation unveiled in our time is not one that I want to think about, you know? But you can't just ignore the Time Signs either. It's obvious that things are happening in our world, reminding us that we are never truly in control. But God is. Now now, I'm not trying to scare anyone into believing what I believe, because it isn't fair to God and it isn't fair to us as beings of free will. I'm just saying that there is a source of hope for any who have been plagued by the evils of the current global climate. And besides, Jesus offers way more than just heaven.

Aye, fight and you may die. Run, and you'll live... at least a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin' to trade ALL the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they'll never take... OUR FREEDOM!- William Wallace, Braveheart

Even though I wrestle with fear about the state of our world, I take comfort in seeing confirmation of my faith begin to play out in these dark times, knowing that there is hope despite what the evidence says. Christmas and Easter culminate, and Jesus bringing freedom to us no matter what is going on around us. That's real. That's life. We now return you to your regulary scheduled awesome blog.

So is the world going to end? Are things coming to a head? Is 2008 a Horseman of the Apocalypse? I don't know. Maybe yes. Maybe no. Maybe things will get better. If that happens, I'll be more than happy to eat humble pie. Just be sure that you watch the skies, because it is of upmost importance that we can read the signs of the seasons.

Right now, a line is being drawn in the sand. All of our 'tolerance' and ambiguity have served as a fulcrum of modern culture, leading to a point of no return. We've lived in a morally ambivilent world for far too long, and postmodern relativism has sunk its ugly talons into our backs. We live in a society that praises the concept of all is right UNLESS someone has the balls to proclaim a sense of absolute right. Then they are shunned, mocked, scorned, hated. And I take comfort in the drawing of black lines, because light will always defeat darkness, and good triumphs over evil in the end, even when it does not appear to be so.

Then you will be handed over to be persecuted and put to death, and you will be hated by all nations because of me- Matthew 24:9 (NIV)

Look, I'm not too proud to say that I don't have all the answers. I just don't. But I believe in a God that does. Life is never going to go 'according to plan'...

There is a God, though, that can sort out the chaos and see us through whatever 2009 and beyond is going to bring.

I'd like to wish you all a safe, happy 2009, and blessings on you all!

Y2K pic- www.dabbledoo.com/ee/images/uploads/gamertell/y2k_bomb_thumb.jpg
Nostradamus pic- www.elmonasterio.org/escritos/wp-content/uploads/Nostradamus.JPG
Joker- www.blog.djcream.org/wp-content/uploads/2008/08/wallpaper_heath_ledger_the_joker_1.jpg