You watched round 2 of the NFL playoffs- but are you ready for round 2 of my NFL playoff commentary? If not, read round 1, and then come back and consider yourself purified to enter this sacred domain. As with before- these are observations and gut reactions...and some random thoughts.
Before I begin, I just want to say that it was sweet, juicy, delicious irony that one of the commercials right before (or at the beginning, I can't remember) of the Bears/Seahawks game was a shaving cream commercial with Ray Rice and Matt Ryan. I know you guys are the NFL players and I am just the lowly blogger- but you sure didn't look ready on Saturday. There have to be better ways to get ready then to simply use Gilllette- like watching film. Or practicing.
Speaking of shaving, I'd like to use this time to take a moment of silence for all the playoff beards that died this past weekend- particularly those of the Atlanta Falcons and New England Patriots, whose playoff beards died before they were really ready.
-Baltimore at Pittsburgh
Unfortunately, I missed much of the first quarter because I was in the middle of risking my life driving on snowy Upper Peninsula roads to pick up my kids. I'm not saying I should be Father-of-the-Year...well, actually, I am. I'm writing this down right now so that when it's time to cast your vote, you remember that I am awesome.
Big ups to Todd Heap- he was on my fantasy team. Not only was he on my fantasy team, but I actually started him a couple games- so he produced real live points for me! I had Big Ben for a while back when I thought I could make the playoffs- but I don't like to talk about that.
Also, I didn't know Antonio Brown (CMU) was on the Steelers- that's awesome! I had no idea he had entered the NFL draft. I guess you can say I was very much a bandwagon CMU fan- and when Dan LeFevour left for the NFL, I left the bandwagon. But still, it was pretty sweet to see Brown make the play of the game to win the game for the Steelers- David Tyree would be proud. Maybe in time, they'll begin to call Big Ben to Brown the Big-MAC attack.
Qwest Field in Seattle has the rep, but I almost feel like Heinz Field was more explosive on this day. Maybe it's just the intensity of the rivalry, or the flow of the game (with the ebb and flow of the turnovers), but that stadium was definitely rocking hardcore at times- especially during that second Ravens turnover deep in their own territory that got the Steelers right back in the game.
What a testosterone fest this game was. Scratch that- it was a testosterone sausage-on-steroids fest. These teams are definitely man teams. I mean- Ray Lewis' is able to rip out his own heart , and he wasn't even the toughest guy on the field! That belongs to Troy Polamalu, whose hair is actually made up of little microscopic Troy Polamalus. I realize that's my third video hyperlink- I'll try to tone it down a little bit. I swear. No, for serious.
If you're the Ravens- how do you feel about Joe Flacco as your franchise quarterback? I mean, I'm not thinking they should draft one in the first round next year- he's been to the postseason all three of his season, and has won four playoff games in that time (all on the road). But when it came time to silence the terrible towels, when Baltimore's need was most dire- he went all Dead Men of Dunharrow on them (Just know that I'm purposely not hyperlinking here- but yes, it's a Lord of the Rings reference)- and no, I don't mean that his invincible spirit destroyed the Steeler army and saved the Ravens from certain defeat. The Ravens had that game for the taking- the Steelers were on the ropes, and they couldn't deliver the knock out blow.
-Green Bay at Atlanta
Again, I didn't actually watch the whole thing- we had some friends come over during the second half and we almost watched Caveman, which is Ringo Starrs finest work since Hard Days Night.
Even though the Packers came together in the second half of the year and whupped much ass, you have to wonder what might have been if they didn't suffer all those injuries- could they have been undefeated-or even better than that? Am I just projecting onto my Fantasy Football team, and the fact that Green Bay Packer injuries cost me a shot at not sucking so bad?
I don't care what happened in the second half (and I'm not just saying that because I didn't watch it and am worried that I will lose all my credibility as a football expert)- when Tramon Williams had that pick 6 right at the end of the half, the Falcons were done. They might call Matt Ryan 'Matty Ice' for more positive reasons, but after watching him versus the Saints in week 16 and against the Pack- the only reason to call him that would be in reference to the fact that he was ice-cold. I do think that having ice in your veins probably puts you at high risk of spontaneous hypothermia. Unfortunately for the Falcons, it sets in for Matt Ryan during the playoffs.
The other side of the coin is Aaron Rodgers- oh my goodness! Like I said, I only watched the first half, but even in that short stretch, you could tell this guy was on fire. There is no better QB in the game right now, even Mark Sanchez (I had typed Tom Brady in my notes, but obviously that reference is a little outdated at this point).
-Seattle at Chicago
Oh man- there is something special about watching snowy playoff football at Soldier Field- I think this is what the playoffs were meant to be. It's like God Himself was showering little flakes of approval right before my eyes.
Jay Cutler reminds me of a lot of Adam Banks from the first Mighty Ducks movie. Obviously a special talent, with lots of 'wow' factors going on- and yet, it's almost like he's playing against the green screen while everyone else is actually in the game. The couple times I've seen him this season, he's just completely isolated from the team.
His demeanor was definitely different this game- he was very much a part of what was going on, and he actually responded with what some experts call emotion. I believe that his fist pump after Chester Taylors' late 1st quarter TD was actually some relief from a lifetime of emotional blue balls.
After watching Greg Olsen explode for over 100 yards receiving and a touchdown on just 3 catches, I feel like he must be The Chosen One that was spoken of in the prophecy. Shoot, I might just start calling him The Avatar. He spent most of the season toiling in anonymity, but when this moment arrived, he got that freaky blue glow in his eyes and said 'It's time-time to put an end to the Seahawk Kingdom and claim the world for Da Bears Kingdom'. What a clutch performance. I haven't seen a player make 3 catches count for so much since Randy Moss and his famous Thanksgiving game against the Cowboys as a rookie.
How many former head coaches does Chicago have on their coaching staff? Three? Man, it's like the bizarro-Bill Walsh tree of coaching- instead of young protege's emerging to head up their own programs, the beaten down retreads come limping home with tails gently tucked between legs. However, Chicago is in the NFC championship game, so maybe it pays to have all that (ahem) "experience".
Does anyone else think that Cutler looks like Patrick Dempsey when he has his helmet on? Speaking of Cutler, that was a very gutsy performance. Hats off to him. Hopefully for the Bears, he didn't use up his allotment of playoff magic in this game- because he's going to need every drop of it for next week.
-New York at New England
While switching to this game, I couldn't remember what channel it was on, so I stopped on Channel 6 (NBC) and it was Johnny Weir figure skating to Lady Gaga's Bad Romance. It was definitely the first time I've had to say to Delaney 'Nope, not a girl, that is actually a guy'.
Rex Ryan is just setting himself up for a whole lot of 'It's personal' jokes for the rest of his career.
I really don't have much to say about this game. As a man who strives to have some honor and integrity (um....why are you giggling?), I do have to commend the Jets on their victory. Even though I really don't like them (or teams/players that trash talk without having actually earned the right to do so), and hope that the Steelers crush them this coming week- they did come into Foxborough and beat the best team in the league. So there's something to be said for that. So, um, good job.
Predictions? Well, I'll keep this short. Packers and Steelers win next week to advance to the Super Bowl.
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